The Bar Has Been Raised: Now YOU jump

Over this past weekend I had the amazing privilege of going to the BECAUSE conference in Minnesota. 3 days of nothing but Bi activism, Bi workshops, performance and food( we had a Bi colored cake and if you thought far too hard my sand which was kinda Bi colors too)
I have been in my fair share of LG BT spaces, I have given my time, my money, my spirit, my spoons and energy to those spaces and organizations.
And you know what?
Unless they can provide for me as a Bi Trans person the welcome and acceptance BECAUSE did?
I’m out of there.
I’ve spent hours working my ass off in LG/GGGG spaces only to when it came down to it, feel like I was barely tolerated. That I wasn’t as valuable as a cis queer nor as pandered and wanted as a cis straight ally. That I was worth less. That I had to or had “picked a side”. I’ve sat in meetings and in one on ones with others who privately confessed that they too are bisexual, but coming out would damage their credibility and they didn’t want to lose that. To end up like me and other out Bi people in the org or space, tirelessly working for them or their cause only to be ignored and shuffled off later.
No more.
I am done jumping through hoops.
At first the bar was so low, as long as I wasn’t being physically assaulted I was OK and I jumped it.
But it was always me and other bi’s jumping. Over and through hoops just for the mere chance, the possibility that we might be tolerated. Not welcome. Not valued. Tolerated.
I have seen online and in person what bisexual community can do, can create.
Welcome, acceptance, friendship, support. All the things were are supposed to be getting out of LG/GGGG spaces. That we so often don’t.
For me BECAUSE raised the bar. I won’t be giving time,money, spoons or spirit to places, orgs and people that can’t jump that bar.
This is me saying
The bar has been raised. NO YOU jump it this time.



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4 responses to “The Bar Has Been Raised: Now YOU jump

  1. Words cannot express how happy this post made me. I am so glad we at the conference welcomed, accepted, befriendfriended, and supported you. It was such a joy to meet you, as well! And you are a darn good writer. You rock!

  2. I will NEVER dance to someone else’s beat when it comes to this; if others can’t relate to me on my level, I’m sure as hell not going to drop down to theirs and out of some pointless sense of being accepted by a community that, as a bisexual, doesn’t give a rat’s ass about me. I’ve accepted and have deal with my sexuality long before LGBT came into existence; those close to me have accepted my sexuality so, yeah, the LGBT community can kiss my ass and I don’t mean that in a good way.

    If they can’t climb the ladder and stand where I am, all up in the clouds, that’s their problem and never mine and I would NEVER give my time, money, or whatever to a community that endorses and practices sexuality prejudice and bias against any who isn’t lesbian or gay.

  3. Lou Hoffman

    Aud. My God how I love you!

  4. Way to be bisexual and proud! We need to invest more in ourselves if we intend on making a difference.

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